I'm looking at buying another 92 toyota it has 38inch mud grapps with 4.30 elocker is this an alright gear to pull the tires and 16-17inch rim or will It eat the clutch and kill the engine

 

4.30 way too high.
Prob need 5.29's for 38's

Unless everywhere you go is downhill

 

Or 5.71

 

x2 ^^

 

you can DO it, but it's not even close to being ideal - and like you already though, it's likely going to take some life off of clutch and engine due to the struggle.

likely has 4.30 gears because that's what a stock e-locker came in. does the front match ratios? people swoop up used e-lockers pretty often - so you could likely sell it off for ok money and buy yourself the one you want, or rebuild this one.

don't forget - just because you have the gears to move 38s, doesn't mean your [stock] brakes can easily stop 38s in emergency situation